Plan B

Posted by Joel on November 18th, 2008 filed in Medical

Hey gang.  Tough day today.  I’ll be brief and will elaborate in future posts.  My PET scan came back positive.  My cancer has returned and unfortunately has spread.  Because of this result, curative surgery is no longer an option for me.  We have some experimental treatment options, but unfortunately none that will ultimately provide a cure.  Adversity is something that I’m getting used to.  I place no blame at anyone’s feet.  The science unfortunately has not found a way around this one.  I absolutely don’t feel as though our prayers went unanswered.  My attitude will remain in the same place that you remember it to have been.  My spirit can’t be broken by this set of news.  April and I will spend some time to get our head around this and we’ll get back up on the horse and continue the ride.  Will talk to you soon.

Joel


21 Responses to “Plan B”

  1. Juie Niezer Says:
    November 18th, 2008 at 1:33 pm

    Hey you…I am so sorry to hear about the news you and April received today..not what any of us were hoping for. I have much faith in your spirit and strength as this fight continues. Please know that you and April and ALL of your family remain not only in my thoughts and prayers but in those of many, many others. Hang in there–Julie

  2. Melissa Cooprider Says:
    November 18th, 2008 at 2:27 pm

    Joel, watching you and your family fight this enormous battle reminds me of how precious life is. I want you to know that your positive attitude and fighting spirit have been amazing. This morning, I prayed that God would give you and April strength, regardless of what the test results were. I hope that you can wrap yourself in the love and prayers that surround you as you move forward with “Plan B.”

  3. Gurnee Knaufs Says:
    November 18th, 2008 at 3:04 pm

    Sorry to hear but know you’ll fight it as hard as you can. Hang tough – you’re in our prayers.

  4. John Walker Says:
    November 18th, 2008 at 4:48 pm

    I pray that hope, not fear would guide our steps. Ps 34:14 “The Lord is close to the broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” You still own our prayers.

  5. Betty Jo Lightle Says:
    November 18th, 2008 at 5:40 pm

    I just want to remind you that I join with countless others, praying fervently
    for you and all your family. We have activated prayer chains from here in Veedersburg to Evansville and in between.
    My current prayer is for the Holy Spirit
    to be especially attentive to you as you “continue the ride”

  6. Erin Carr Says:
    November 18th, 2008 at 7:02 pm

    I don’t get it.
    Why remission in the first place? Why even get our hopes up? This seems cruel. May 20th comes and blind sides us with devastation. We spend a few months in shock as we come to terms with the possibilities and we pray fervently for a miracle.

    August 18th comes and gives us this great big miracle, beyond our wildest imagination, reminding us that even in the darkest hour, there is always hope.

    But why? Just to have the football taken out from under us just as we get ready to kick? Were our prayers not strong enough? Did we get too lax in our pleas? Were we sidetracked? Did we let you down? Did we let April and the kids down? Certainly this couldn’t have been the plan all along could it?

    I know all the spiritual arguments to this. I’ve said it hundreds of times myself. I know we aren’t alive for life on earth. I know that this isn’t the way God intended for us to live and our job is to further His kingdom through our trials. I understand that this is a speck of time and it doesn’t compare to the eternity that we’ll spend in heaven.

    And when do you get sick of trying to bolster the rest of us? And why is the cancer attacking the biggest fighter I know? You don’t have to be strong for us. We are the ones who are here to carry your burden, not the other way around.

    How are we supposed to go on and be happy in joyous times without you? Why do I get to stay here and see your kids when you are the one who has taught me to be a better person. You should be here.
    This is what I don’t understand.

    Sometimes it just feels good to be mad. Sometimes it can be exhausting to be hopeful and positive. It just feels good to say that this stinks.

    I love you,
    Erin

  7. Joel Says:
    November 18th, 2008 at 7:47 pm

    Erin,

    I know that this is and will continue to be tough for us to understand. I don’t pretend to know any more than what has been explained to me. I’ve also shook my fists at the sky to no visible avail long ago. Trust in me when I say that I know the pain hurts but it also can heal. This will be ok. We’ll all be ok.

  8. Karen Allen Says:
    November 18th, 2008 at 7:49 pm

    Joel, April, Rachel, Daphne and Vincent,
    You are in our thoughts and prayers.
    Love,
    Karen, Steve, Riley & Cooper

  9. Lisa Knauf Says:
    November 18th, 2008 at 8:44 pm

    Hi Joel, Thank you for the poem. It has touched me and my outlook on the time I need to laugh more with my own kids and life. You have humbled sooo many of us. You are an inspiration to your family and friends. Although your body continues to fight this disease within you, you have many prayer warriors who are holding the fort for you. God be with you and comfort you. I believe in miracles and have faith that our Lord will ALWAYS take care of you and your family forever. We love you.
    Lisa, Don, Kyla, Kira and Talon.

  10. Robert LaMothe Says:
    November 19th, 2008 at 11:57 am

    poncho, so we can’t go up the middle to win this one, not a problem. I know God sometimes prefers the hook and latteral to win the big games. Just be ready for the pitch cause we are takin’ this one in!

    P.S.(no Painter will not be throwing the pass, so relax)

    pals- LaMothe and Goins

  11. Arnie Says:
    November 19th, 2008 at 12:20 pm

    Hi Peigh Family,
    I am very sorry to hear this news, it has been difficult for me to function and think normally since so I cannot imagine how it must be for you. Everything will be okay. I know that does not sound very comforting right now. God has a way that we do not always understand. Don’t focus on what the future may hold but more on the present and what gifts you will find there. I know there are many so put your energy into finding them.

    With all our Love and Prayers,
    Peggyann, Arnie, Tiffany, Monica, Foster, Michael, David, Bridget and Spencer

  12. Susan Welch Cantin Says:
    November 19th, 2008 at 12:28 pm

    My thoughts/prayers remain with you and your family. I remain in awe of your strength and courage. You inspire so many.

  13. Carrie (Peigh) Colvin Says:
    November 19th, 2008 at 6:05 pm

    YOU ARE STRONG ENOUGH TO RISE ABOVE MOST ANY TROUBLED TIME…
    TODAY MAY BE A MOUNTAIN, BUT YOU, JOEL, WERE BORN TO CLIMB.

    It continues to inspire me to see life in you defined by such enormous courage-
    the courage you’ve shown to everyone who has witnessed how the worst that life had to offer has brought out the best in you.

    Joel and April, the news you were given by the doctors is so hard to receive. Your faith and strength continues unfaltered. But as you sit down today with Rachel, Daphne and Vincent to share with them this concept that seems so difficult for us to wrap our own heads around, I pray that you will feel the peace of God’s presence surrounding all of you in His love.

    We love all of you,
    Carrie, Kelsey and Madison

  14. Heather (Barker-Wise) Horine Says:
    November 19th, 2008 at 7:22 pm

    Joel,

    I am praying that you and your family are doing ok. Keep fighting the fight and know that so many people are thinking and praying with you! Peace to you all!

    Love,

    Heather Horine

  15. Judy Smith Says:
    November 20th, 2008 at 8:01 am

    Joel & April & family
    So sorry about the news you received. Just know so many thoughts and prayers are with you now and always. With your strength and understanding you will all be okay. We continue to pray for you and some miracle that things will get better. Please know that you are in our thoughts and prayers everyday.
    Judy, Lowell and family

  16. Paula Cooprider Says:
    November 20th, 2008 at 12:10 pm

    Joel, April and Family,
    I am sorry that it has taken me this long to be able to write. And I’m sorry not to be able to express myself as eloquently as you and some of the others do. I think I accepted your MRI results as the miracle we were praying for. (My mistake)So, I’m still praying for a miracle of healing, that you will be able to stand strong, and that the drugs will have the desired effect. I still am so proud of your positive, determined spirit.
    Hope to see you soon. Love, Paula

  17. Martha Sechman Says:
    November 20th, 2008 at 1:07 pm

    Joel,April & Family,
    I am so sorry to your PET scan didn’t turn out as we all prayed it would.
    It is almost uncomprehensible that God continues to test your faith, as well as the rest of your family.
    Our prayers will continue, please stay positive, miracles do happen!
    Love to you all,
    Martha, Bob and the entire Myers Family

  18. Mackenzie Carr Says:
    November 20th, 2008 at 7:06 pm

    Dear Uncle Joel,
    I just found out today about your bad news. I had a lot of questions about it. Me and my mom have been talking and looking for good things. I will keep you posted. Just remember I always have you in my HEART!

    I Love You.
    Love,
    Mackenzie

  19. Lynda and Mark Says:
    November 22nd, 2008 at 6:38 am

    Joel,

    This is Mrs. Chapman (as known by Vincent!:-)) and husband. First, please know that we pray for you and will continue. Second, thank you so much for your posts. It’s so easy to get wrapped up in the “things” of this world that really don’t amount to much when all is said and done. You certainly bring that into perspective and the TRUE importance of family, friends, faith, hope, love and truth. Please take care and know that the Hinkle Creek staff will help and care for your children in any way you need. Sincerely and with God’s peace to you and your family, Mark and Lynda Chapman

  20. Amy Walker Says:
    November 22nd, 2008 at 7:00 am

    Joel and April,

    I write this note with tears in my eyes and a tightness in my throat. Life can be so hard and seem unfair. My heart is truly broken yet I know you will remain united in this battle. I still believe that this battle can be overcome. You amazed the doctors with your ability to handle treatments and got great initial results. That same spirit and mental fortitude still exists in you. Joel, maybe just maybe you will be the one to find a cure for esophageal cancer. Even though I am saddened with this set back I will always have hope and will pray for you, April, Rachel , Daphne and Vincent with a renewed fervor. I am also praying for the doctors and scientists for wisdom and the cure. I am praying for peace of mind and calmness for you so you can attack this with your total being and still be able to hug and enjoy you three precious children. I am very thankful for you and your delightful, special family.

    With all of my heart and love,
    Amy Walker

  21. Tiffany and Tim Says:
    November 22nd, 2008 at 8:53 am

    Joel and April –
    Tim and I are at you disposal for anything that you need. We have some ideas and will be in touch. Please know that we are deeply sorry for the news and love you.

    Tiffany

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